Empty Spaces

Don't you just hate it when you say that you'll "do it" tomorrow, but then when tomorrow comes you just couldn't be assed doing what you were supposed to have done yesterday?

Thats exactly how i am with my uni study. I've been putting it off since Friday.

I ask myself.. why don't you just do the damn work already? I don't know. Maybe because its boring and i just dont want to. But maybe theres something more to it.

I feel like my whole degree has been pretty pointless. Its been mainly theory and essay writing and researching. Nothing has ever really been practical. And i guess thats why i find myself not really relating to well to my studies as im more of a 'doer'. I like practical things and i like keeping myself busing DOING things and seeing results. Give me some electronic device to pull apart and I'd pull it apart and put it back together in an instant. Give me something broken to try to fix, and i'll do it. Heck i even tried soldiering broken contacts in my old monitor with a clothes iron! But tell me to sit down and do some study and rest assured a week can go by and i'd still not have it done.

It really bothers me that i feel this way towards my studies. Im beginning to think that this isnt' really what i want to do. If i could go back in time and change what degree i was going to study, i'd probably do either architecture, industrial design or graphic design/multimedia/photography. Its too late to be thinking about that stuff now though, because im already in my last year of my 5 year business degree.

very disheartening to learn that you know longer have any interest in what you're studying.

Another reasons for me not wanting to do my study that i've conjured up is:
- Im so desperately just wanting to do something with someone that i just sit here all day thinking about things i COULD be doing with SOMEONE else that i just don't do any work.

You know, its pretty silly that i think that, because when i do get invited out by friends, i don't really want to go. - i should probably explain my reason for this in more detail but i'll explain this bit in a different post.

*sigh*

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In other news I was chatting with TN on msn before. I really like him yet he really annoys the hell out of me. When we talk, its always gotta be about something. Most of the times its about mobile phones, android, various isp's and how they suck etc or something he's found on whirlpool forums. Which is okay but sometimes it gets boring. Sometimes i really don't care what the latest revision of firmware he's just downloaded to his phone includes that the old version didn't. I just want to talk to him. See how his day has been. Have him ask me how I've been. But no.. He's never asked me how i've been. Its always me askin him. And then he'd just reply with some short response that took him a whole 2 secs to think up. Something like "yeh good. u?". And then he'll change the subject. urgh..

Seriously i thought i was pretty socially retarded, but he seems a bit worse off. Or maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me. I feel like thats the main reason sometimes. Im becoming too attached to TN. He's probably one of the only reason i go on MSN anymore really.

I got invited out tonight, not sure whats happening though. Will let you know next time i update.