Empty Spaces

It hurts so bad when you take a step back and look at your life and realise that its going absolutely nowhere and no matter how much effort you put in it feels like you're just flailing in the water not getting anywhere. Sometimes it feels like life isnt worth it.

no not really.

Havent been on here for a while. For many reasons. For none at all. Partly because coming on here means that more often than not i will have a problem or an issue. I dont want to have a problem or an issue so i stopped coming here hoping that said problem or issue will just dissappear. And if it doesn't dissappear, i'll just pretend that i never had a problem or issue in the first place. Because if i just hide it inside and pretend it doesnt exist, then it doesnt exist right?

A lot of things have happened since the last time i wrote a proper post. Many things have changed. Some for the better some for the worse. The things around me have changed and my circumstances have changed. Yet the feeling within me is more or less the same. The void and the darkness is still there.

This existence still feels empty and pointless. I try too hard to find meaning in my life. What if life doesn't actually have a meaning at all?

So...
1) Graduated
2) Meltdown
3) Lost
4) Relocated
5) Disconnected
6) Reconnected
7) Confusion
8) Frustration
9) Depression

Thats life so far.




---------------

Light1

Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

when my eyes are closed.

I think i've just hit one. Im stuck. I dont know what to do. I dont know where to go.

Having an identical twin :-D

*inspired by JEDWARD*

lolzorz

A few days ago, I was almost involved in a fatal car accident. Fault lays on the other party. I cant help but wonder what things would be like if I hadn't have been so lucky. When i think about the incident, a part of me keeps wishing that the outcome was different. Imagine, i'd be gone instantly. Escape from this world. It makes me feel happy.